Garbage Disposal
by Martie Barth
I am a living garbage disposal. I have a fantastic nose for sniffing out tempting morsels. My humans are constantly pulling me away from some doggy delicacy saying, "No, Tasha!"
When I walk out the front door on walks, my first stop is always the front flower bed. Begonia heads are soooooo delicious. Unfortunately this sends my lady human into spasms. She cries out, "Tasha, leave the flowers alone!" I like flowers.
I love being able to run freely. On your mark, get set, the kennel door opens, GO! I zoom out, racing my sister down the track to the finish line - the skidoo hut. Friday, the day after Steak Night, is the best day to visit the skidoo hut as those sloppy snowmobilers chuck their bones into the fire pit or better yet into the snow. With our mouths full off we race again with our treasures while our humans trail behind. The only problem is that every time I settle down to have a concentrated chew, my humans get greedy and try to take my bones away. I constantly have to be on my guard to stay ahead of them. My lady human keeps saying, "Bones aren't good for you, Tasha." They taste pretty good to me. Mmmmmm. I love bones.
Another of my favourite doggy treats is toilet paper or used Kleenex tissues. One day I grabbed the end of the toilet roll and walked out of the bathroom with a white train following me. Imagine my delight when I turned to see the feast behind me. I started where I was and gobbled my way back to the centre of the train. I began feeling somewhat full so I flopped down to chew on my mouthful. "Tasha!" Oops, wrong again. I love toilet paper.
My greatest adventure of all was my lady human's moisturizer gloves. She usually kept them in the drawer beside her bed but one day she left them on top of the bedside table. The smell of the cream on those gloves was irresistible. When my human was busy in the kitchen, I quietly slipped into the bedroom, took the tip of one creamy finger in my mouth and sank to the floor. I had to hurry before my human walked in. I tried to chew but there wasn't time. With a mighty GULP I swallowed that glove whole. What a mouthful!!! Well, did that cause a stir! When my human found me with a somewhat pained and guilty look on my face she was on the phone immediately to the vet, all upset.
I had quite a case of the burps for about a week and a heavy feeling in my stomach. About ten days later I was out in the run trying to do my business. I strained and grunted and grunted and strained. Suddenly I felt a POP and a light sense of relief. I turned around to investigate and there, on the concrete was that moisturizer glove - a little darker in colour, slightly holey, but basically intact. After several hot washes, the glove returned to the bedside table drawer. My human still talks about that glove and shows it with pride to her disbelieving friends.
I love foods of all kinds. Have you something interesting for me? Leave it around. I'll dispose of it.
Good friend, faithful companion
You are sorely missed
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To Huskies Over the Rainbow Bridge